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Buzz: You know…I could…I fought for this country, and I know you don’t get to pick and choose the parts you fight for. But I know-*chime* Bixel: I should go number-two soon. Abed: Meowmeowbeenz takes everything subjective and unspoken about…

Annie: Nobody picks up on my patterns! What am I gonna say next? Graham cracker! You didn’t know. Jeff: Hey, it’s the “Awww” couple! Everyone: Awww. Dean Pelton: Payday is postponed until next week, so this, is my freestyle rap…

Buzz: Hank’s a knob. He doesn’t have any hobbies or interests. All he does is play that…What do you call that crap with the dungeons and the dragons? Abed: Dungeons & Dragons. Buzz: That’s the crap. Abed: Nobody feels that…

Annie: I guess I knew Pierce was part of a weird futuristic cult, but I wasn’t prepared for a funeral with so much beeping. Shirley: Well, let’s not judge. Everyone has a right to whatever fake religion they delusionally choose.…

Neil: Hey bro, free crackers. Want to spend your life opening lockers? Garrett: You don’t have to raise your voice, I’m going as fast as can! Oh, great! Now I have these folders to deal with! Et tu, pencil? When…

Jeff: Any questions? You, Red Hair. I’m not gonna learn names. Red Hair: Will there be a syllabus? Jeff: “Will there be a syllabus?” Is good example of a question. Moving on, Ski Cap. Ski Cap: How are we gonna…

Annie: Lucky. I transferred to Forensics late and got the worst classes. Skull Fragment Collection, Advanced Advanced Decomp, and Intro to Senselessness were all full. Pierce: You had to win, didn’t you? When I was inches from the finish line.…

Troy: I had to smile, when I didn’t feel like smiling. That hurts my face. Abed: I’m emotionless, logical, smarter than everybody else. Annie: Hey! Abed: I wanted to make a prequel and I ruined everything, I guess it could…

Jeff: Annie, do we have to have another talk about you wanting to play house with me? Annie: Sha. Sha-na-not. Kevin: Thank you all so much for inviting me to my first Christmas. Oh, Annie explained to me that “no…

Dean Pelton: Okay, this awkward silence has been going on for days. Granted, Jeffrey looks amazing when he broods, but this has got to stop. Jeff: Why did you make, have, and bring these? Dean Pelton: Mm. Jeff: Don’t answer.…